Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

Q:what has two legs and bleeds A: a dog cut in half

A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

So this man is walking down the street. Just walking. Nothing wrong. Suddenly a giant whirlpool appears in the street. The man is sucked in and the whirlpool disappears. Everything's fine right? Right? Yeah, he wanted to die. So every things okay? NOPE. He left the oven on.

Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

stephen hawking walks into a bar...

What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

What did Helen Keller say when she got raped? Stop raping me.

An englishman, irish-man and a scotsman walk into a bar. Englishman orderds a pint of becks, Irishman a guiness and the Scot a whiskey. Everything is absolutely fine and nothing of even remote interest happens.

Rob Bell

a man reads his wife a poem "roses are red, violets are blue, and I love you." the wife talks to her brother asking why he changed the poem he said men do that cause they love you. later that night she got pregnant.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

How do you make a little girl cry?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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