Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

thumb_up thumb_down -43

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

thumb_up thumb_down -209

Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

thumb_up thumb_down +156

Whats funny about a car crash? If a bowl of soup is talking.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A man walks into a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A man walks into a bar, has a few drinks and spots a nice looking lady He then follows her home and molestes her child.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

In Soviet Russia, You drive the car, fill it up with gas and park it Just like in America

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +159

Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

thumb_up thumb_down +157

Yo mamma's so fat, she should try NutriSystem.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats long black, eight inches and sometimes has white on the tips of them? a black mans foot the wears an eight inch shoe.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops