Q: What do you call a black pilot? A: A pilot, you racist

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What did the pope do when he saw the grinch? He prayed for his soul.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing because polar bears lived in the northern hemisphere and penguins lived in the southern. But if one is smuggled from north to south or vice-versa. The polar would growl and consume the penguin.

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Who let the dogs out? The pet shop.

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What's worse than death? Nothing.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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What did the boy get for creating a fantastic AntiJoke? Leukemia

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

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whats arrogant, has blonde hair and belongs in the kitchen? Gordon Ramsay

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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- I shot the sheriff! - You murderer

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What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

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Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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Where does a homeless person live? No where

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Why did the Koala Fall out of the tree, It was Dead

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Why did he buy ANTIJOKE THE BOOK! - ? Because he wanted to read it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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