What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

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Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

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What did the young boy say to the adorable kitten? "Aww"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

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Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

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ObamaCare

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What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

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Why women like NBA players so much? Because they have money.

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What do you call a sexually abusive man. Dad.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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Two gay guys hosted a barbecue. The music and food was great. Everyone had a good time.

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What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

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How many aborigines does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They have no idea what electricity is.

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Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

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What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

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roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

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pizzano is a tool.

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So a Jewish Family walks into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

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LIE

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who the hell keeps shiting in my garden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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