a mom tell her kid not to play with knives ten years later tells her kid not to play with knives and the kid asks y and the mom says because ur older brother killed his father and himself playing with knives so the kid said mom i promise i wont do that then kils his mom and himself

ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

What is white and when it falls, your fridge is broken? Your fridge.

What is the best type of pepper? Well, some people say that the yellow pepper is the sweetest and most delicious, although others prefer red, green or orange peppers.

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

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What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

roses are grey violets are grey i am color blind

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

how do you make a baby cry? throw bricks at his face.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What is sad about four lawyers in a car driving of a cliff? The car fit six people.

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

whats bright and yellow? the sun.

What's red and on fire? My crotch

Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

What do you call a sexually abusive man. Dad.

What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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