What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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I am a mime

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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What has four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill someone? A pool table.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops