Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

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Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

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im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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An overweight person falls down the stairs.. They had to be taken to A&E as they suffered very serious injuries.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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How many teachers would it take to find their way out of a maze? Depends on their area of speciality. If the teacher(s) are mathematicians or logicians, probably one or two at most. If they are home economics teachers, possibly more.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the dog cross the road? To eat the chicken. Why did the police officer cross the road? To tranquilize the dog and the chicken.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops