Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

Steve Jobs is alive.

star wars kid

What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

Roses are red Violets are blue You're parents are dead All your friends are too

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

So a man walks into a bar, right?

Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

roses are red, violets are blue, {insert name here} is f**ked up, (s)he want to have sex with you

What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

What has two legs? Half a cat

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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