How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

h

The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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