Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

school homewrok

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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