Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Where did Jimmy go during the bombing? An underground shelter where he would be kept from harm.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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