Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

A chicken walked into the bar...

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

A guy walks into a bar and falls.

My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

Roses are red, yup.

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

if you don't like this you're gay

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

whats worth than finding half a dead worm in your apple getting rapped by your step dad

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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