Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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why did the man reverse time? because his girlfriend died,also this man was super

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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What is stupid and looks like you? You.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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A knock knock B who's there A nobody

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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This is an anti-joke.

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A blind woman was watching tv. think about it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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