Darude - Sandstorm

What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

Once upon a time, there was a man named John. John loved pancakes

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

Knock Knock Who is there? 9-11 9-11 who? You said you would never forget.

There's a blonde, Brunette and a Redhead stuck at the top of a cliff. A genie appears and says he will grant them each one wish. The Brunette wishes she could at the bottom of the cliff, The redhead wishes she could be back with her children and the blonde would just love to be back to her family. :/

Why did the man explode when he ate the cheeseburger? Because the man was actually a bomb.

a man walks into a bar..... OWW!!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

what has 9 legs, 4 feet and is orange? nothing.

If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? No, the impact of the colliding objects being the tree and the ground causes a disturbance in the silence thus causing a sound. The tree gets too much credit.

What did the working mother get her son for Christmas? Empty promises.

ok i'm typing, so how does this work?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? were both therapists.

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

When is a door not a door? When its ajar.

How do you survive a plane crash?? You don't

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? Literally an endless list of things.

What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

A rabbit enters in apharmacy and asks for a carrot. The man says:"There aren´t any carrots in here." In the next two days the same happens, but the man replies that he'll hammer the rabbit if he comes back. In the other day, the rabbit is found dead with a bloody hammer nearby.

September 8, 2011 Amy Winehouse: 46 days sober. Date of death: July 23, 2011

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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