An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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What's better than a pile of dead babies? Anything.

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What did the boy Tell to his friends? Nothing. He has noone.

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What is worse than the Holocost? Keeping the Jews alive.

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Q: What does a blond do with a box of crayons? A: Paints a picture

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Q: What's black and can crash into you A: a black guy in a car

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

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Yo momma's so nice that she baked cookies for us. Please tell her I said thanks.

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Your moms so dumb she stuffed a battery up her butt and said i got the POWA!

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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Three guys are in the desert. They find a lamp, they rub it, and a genie appears. The genie says "I'll grant each of you a wish." So the first guy says "I want to return to my family in my native country." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The second guy says "I want to live in Hollywood, be famous and rich, and have dozens of girls around me." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. The third guy says "I want to go to Hawaii." The genie snaps his fingers, and the guy disappears. So all three guys end up being happy.

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What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

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What's the best anti joke? this one

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A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

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Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

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C'est l'histoire d'un français paumé qui se retrouve sur un site anglais.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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A man walks into a bar. The other two ducked, and then immediately called an ambulance.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was lying about the wheels.

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whats funny? small ginger girls who die there head red, then it turns ginger again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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