Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

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What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

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Why was the alpaca sad He just got raped

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whats better than sex? cookies

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If I just post the same thing someone else posted and say it was mine, I'm gonna be really popular because everyone is too dumb to realize it's not my original work of genius.

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Q: What does Osama Bin Laden's dead body and a sea sponge have in common? A: Nothing. One was buried in respectful accordance with Islamic law and the other is an animal of the phylum Porifera that's incapable of murdering thousands of innocent persons.

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roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Jumped.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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Two muffins were in the oven. One muffin goes "whoo! It's getting hot in here!" the other muffin goes "ahhh! A talking muffin!!!"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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Feet

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I friended Paul Walker on Xbox, but he's always in the Dashboard.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

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2 scrubbers walk into a room , one says " can you you smell fresh-air spray"?

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A gorilla walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of celery. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the given situation.

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why does kelly keep going on about breasts ? cus shes into chicks !!!

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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