What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

thumb_up thumb_down +108

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because there is no such person as Micheal J. Fox. Michael J. Fox, on the other hand, cannot draw a perfect circle because he has Parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the only type of wood that doesn't float? Natalie wood.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -74

A jew walks into an Oven....

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

I jacked off over a blind girl the other day, she never saw me coming

thumb_up thumb_down +27

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

thumb_up thumb_down -13

roses are grey violets are grey everything is? grey i'm colour blind fml

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -143

Why doesn't the mexican have a job? Grad school is taking up too much of his time.

thumb_up thumb_down +114

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops