Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Cause he was dead.

What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

Feet

A man came up to me and said," you suck" You know what I told him "YOU SUCK!"

derp

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

why did the little boy cry? some gang killed his family infront of him.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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