How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

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Why did the man die in his office? Because a storm five miles away took down a power line that fell onto a truck igniting the fuel in it causing an explosion that started a forest fire that burned down another power line causing a spark to fly out of the man's phone and into his ear, killing him instantly.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I have amnesia so say hello to your nan when you get home

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What's winnie the pooh's middle name? the

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Why was the woman crying I kick her in the ass really really really hard... With steal toe boots... That had a spike on them... That was biped in poison... And man did she scream.

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You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

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Measurology: The measurement of your measure can measure the measurement of measures, along with measurements exceeding the measurements of measurement, with measures at the measurement of measuring measured measures. - ToFlyForU_28

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch, he says, I did not see that bar there."

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asd

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What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

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The horse's name was Friday

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt a black guy ate him.

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Q. Why did the sheep die? A. I pushed it off a bridge

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm bored of this how about you?

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A woman comes home and finds her husband with another woman. Their marriage collapses and the husband goes on to marry the other woman and his ex-wife commits suicide.

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Your mama's so fat she's going on weight-watchers to pursue a healthier lifestyle and avoid the longterm effects of obesity.

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What's a bug's favorite sport? Bug's can't play sports.

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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What smells worse than a skunk? A dead skunk.

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A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

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Q: What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: Nothing, they never met! :)

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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