Q1: How do you get an elephant to laugh? A1: Tell it a joke. Q2: How do you get a cow to laugh? A2: Cows can't laugh.

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How do you get a clown out of a tree? Shoot him in the head.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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An Asian person drove home safely.

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Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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What is the saddest part of a Jew's life? The fact that every single day the world turns more and more 'jokingly' anti-semetic until the point that the Jewish people have become so overwhelmed by depression that they begin committing suicide until the point of Jewish extinction.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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How do you keep an italian from talking? You duct tape his mouth.

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What has three legs and bleeds? A cat with a cut off leg.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

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What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

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what did batman day to robin? get in the car robin.

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Haiku's can be fun But they don't always make sense Refrigerator

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is a real guy. Sorry kids.

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Knock knock. Who's there? To get the other side!

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Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

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Dad: "When I was your age, I had to walk outside to catch the school bus. If it snowed heavily the night before, school was canceled."

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what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves the bar slightly intoxicated.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? Me :'(

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Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

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Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: One leg is both the same.

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Billy had a dream. He saw himself becoming rich and famous. He drove an expensive car and lived in a mansion. His career reached its peak and he was accused by the media of having numerous sexual relations and drug problems. After 3 years of rehab he made an excellent comeback tour in which his name made it back onto the front pages and his respect regained. In his later years, he died of an accidental drug overdose and his loyal fans pay tribute to him every year. But this will never happen to Billy. Billy is a cactus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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