What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

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Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

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im telling maguire

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

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How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

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Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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