A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down

Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

thumb_up thumb_down

woman's rights

thumb_up thumb_down

Little Susie fell of the swings. Where did she go? On the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Does it really matter?

thumb_up thumb_down

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

thumb_up thumb_down

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do u call a cripple Biv

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops