what did the asian father say to his son after seeing he got a B- in math? "There's small room for improvement but overall you did a great job son."

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What did the clown say to the other clown? I was not present at this conversation, and therefore I was not able to catch what they were saying

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Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

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Why was the boy sad. Because he had been diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and he had been told he has three days to live. That's why.

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What's red ad spins in circles? A baby with it's head nailed to the ground.

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what do you call your cousin drew? drouchebag

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The song Friday Rules!

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How do you get pikachu on a bus? You don't pokemon are fictional characters

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Q. What did Tarzan Say when he met Jane? A. Tarzan Being raised by apes and not learning English would have no knowledge of the language and would probably hoot and screech like his fellow ape brothers

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

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roses are red violets are blue you should have been aborted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? While I can never be entirely sure, I would assume that there was something on the other side which has peaked its interest.

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What is the difference in a crow. There is none. Both legs are of equal length.

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Q. Why did the man crash the car? A. Because the driver was a bling man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You touch yourself. I do, too.

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What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

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What do you call a Jewish police officer? It depends on if you are Mel Gibson or not.

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh.. Okay.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty jumped off and committed suicide.

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What did the african american ninja say to the jewish bartender? Can I have a beer?

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A POW is sitting in his cell when the guard walks up to him. He says "You may choose one of these tortures, drowning or listening to Rebecca Black." The POW chose Rebecca Black, for even though he disliked her music, it was much better than getting drowned

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what can I get you?" The man replies "what do you recommend?" The bartender says "get a beer." The man says "okay."

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Because Jimmy was a fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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