a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

GEOVANI is a queer that dosen't believe me

A joke

What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to see him rocking and rolling on it.:)

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't; by the time Keller owned her first dog, she was an adult with exceptional communicative abilities for one with her condition. She frequently wrote about her beloved dogs and is even credited with introducing the Akita breed to the United States. If her dog had run away, it would be unlikely that she would have been allowed further dogs.

What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater

Justin Bieber had sex with a woman.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as it is capable of. Personally depends on the weight of the wood.

what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

your fat

Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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