A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

Why did the Polar Bear fall through the ice? The ice was unable to support his mass

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

three men walk into a bar. they are immediately rushed to urgent care due to blunt force trauma

Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

BIG PENIS

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

Q: How did the hispanic youth express his irrational fear of snakes when he watched, "Snakes: The Life of These Tranquil Creatures"? A: He screamed and burst into an uncontrollable bout of agitating laughter invoked by his natural uneasiness at having witnessed something very disturbing indeed.

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

What is the difference between therapist and the rapist? A space.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

Oh hey is your dad good at golf? No, he's not really good at anything except lying.

whats worse then justin beiber NOTHING

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

knock knock. who's there greench greench who greenchicken feathers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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