Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

There was a priest, a rabbi, and a shaman. All three of three of them walked into a bar. They began a heated debate over the benefits of their healthcare plan, payed the tab on their drink, then proceeded to drive home in their Toyota Prius.

9/11.

Why did the snowman melt? It got tired of everyday life and decided that it would be best if he disappeared from society... His name was Dave...

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

You can throw a horse a Frisbee but you can't make him catch it

Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

Why did Billy fall off the Empire State building? He didn't fall, he jumped. He decided to commit suicide due to his lack of friends, caring parents, low self-esteem, and self-concious issues. Billy really needed a therapist.

Why did the groom have cold feet? Because his socks were slightly damp resulting in evaporation and the cooling of his feet, as well as the cold weather in December.

One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

There were a boy with cancer, and when a said "were" is because he is dead now

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

how do you tell a joke on anti-joke? you don't.

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

What what In the butt

What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

Ruller

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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