How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why did the fat black guy fail his eye exam? He's blind.

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Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

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How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

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A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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Why did Donald Duck go to college? He didn't, he's a fictional cartoon character.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh

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What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a nice man.

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

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How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow, she decided to invest in a teeth whitening procedure and begin a healthier dental hygiene regimen.

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Whats something only kids wear? Clothes

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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How did the little boy survive war? He respawned at his teams side of the map

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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