a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is worst then a blond trying to pass collage?....... There is nothin wrong with that

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between a blond and a red-head? They have different hair colors.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What did one muffin say to another? A: Nothing. Muffins don't talk, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what's worst than being gay? being black

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a duck and a cow? One is an aquatic fowl and the other is a farmland mammal.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Will my son live, doctor? No because you don't have a son and I am not a doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +13

have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A guys walks up to a drug dealing looking to score some drugs. The deal was made an the man quickly arrested the drug dealer because he was actually a undercover cop

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the frog say to the goat? Nothing frogs can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops