Whys the Elephant afraid of the mouse? i dont know im not an Zoologist

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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My name is me I like fired chicken!

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A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

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WEED!

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Why did the man stop eating? Because he took an arrow to the knee.

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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This comment is anti to jokes.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing chair ? Gravity.

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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"We all miss somebody a lot every now and then, its only human! But never give up, just keep reloading and firing until you hit that somebody!" Moral: Moral, answer me, MORAL MOOOOORAAAAAAAAL! DUN DU DURUN, DUN DUN DUN! *gunshot* (The moral section just because I love them red thumbs ^^)

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- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

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What green and eats rocks? Grass, i lied about the rocks

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what the difference between Obama and osama bin laden nothing

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What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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