If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

If you beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling, you will be proud of yourself and he will go home with nothing.

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

Roses aren't blue Violets aren't red She was my ex wife But now she's just dead.

Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

Why couldn't the Jeffersons adopt a black baby? Their fireplace was empty.

Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He had a stroke.

uh uh uh uh .... oh i swallowed my gum

a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

What did the one eyed boy say at the movie theater? 3D was a boy choice

holly, a japanese boy and an american boy walked into a internet cafe. They then began to play runescape so they could train together and trade rare items.

balls in ya mouf

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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