What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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If you're happy and you know it go to hell.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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If I had a dollar for every funny joke on this site... I would have quite a few dollars. I would't be rich, but I'd have enough money to pay for me and three friends to go see a movie. So I'm talking like $40-$55, give or take. However, do keep in mind that that cost does not include the purchase of any popcorn/food/beverages.

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A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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Why couldn't Paul see. He got stabbed in the eye by two mexicans

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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whats worse than a wussy times two a wusst times three i like boobs u basterds suck a dick

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Q: if you spend more than 10 minutes on anti-joke.com, you will soon start to see some of the problems with the user experience. name some and propose solutions. A: Well, as you said, there are many. But a huge one is all the repeat jokes. The site could really benefit from some mechanism to identify repeat jokes.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Pineapple.

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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A duck walks into a bar he buys a drink and says To the bartender "Put it on my bill." the duck is charged With $800.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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My name is Jeff

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

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Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

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are u black unlucky

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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