Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

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Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

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Why is Obama's name Obama? Obama

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

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What's worse than being fat? Being gay

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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What comes after 23? 24.

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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Miami Heat.

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im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

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The WNBA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

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Freddie Mercurys teeth

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

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This one time at band camp....

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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