What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

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how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

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What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

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My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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Q: How do you get a black guy out of a tree? A: You cut the rope.

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what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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