what the hell happened to your face

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

Looks like you are having a TUFF time recovering from the game.....lol.....

How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

What did the rapper Proof say when he got in a fight? Nothing, Proof is dead.

How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

What do you get when you cut a stick of butter? a butt.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

LET

What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

Man goes into a bar and orders 7 shots, the bartender says "Long day, huh?", the Man says yeh then goes home and kills himself.

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

what did the black women name her child jamaal

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a whore.

what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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