Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Religion

Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Women's sports.

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

What's the difference between a muffin and a scone? One's a muffin.

a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

what do you call a tall black man with big ears? orangatang

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

Granny porn!

If you shaved Chuck Norris' beard, you'd find a chin.

Why did the old man fall off his bicycle? Because somebody threw a fridge at him.

Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

when ever i finish a sentence say im a man Me :i met a girl You:im a man Me: i invited her to my place You: im a man Me: we sleept together You:im a man Me:she wisperd in my ear You: im a man

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...