what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

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Knock Knock. The doors unlocked you can come in. The two men have a nice conversation while enjoying a couple of beers and then order a pizza because they get hungry.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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You know whats retarted? people with down syndrome.

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What's white and very boney? A bone

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Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

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What is black and has no education A tire.

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what's really good and is on TV Jersey Shore

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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what would your nan do if she was alive right now? scratching the top of the coffin.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Why don't nuns wear bras? Because god supports everything!

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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