Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

What's brown and sticky? Poop

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate black people, and mexicans too.

A man calls his wife, but she doesn't pick up. He comes home and shouts his wife's name, but no one responds. He walks upstairs and sees the bedroom door half-opened. He enters and sees his wife sleeping.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

"You go, Glen Coco" -Mean Girls, 2004

What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

Yo mamas so fat that she decided to get a gastric bypass to help lose the weight.

Reading books

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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