Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Anthony sucks

Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

Frown is a four letter word.

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow" you don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement.

The Pope, a Rabi and an Islamic religious leader go into a room and come out with what? A new understanding of each others cultures.

why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

Major League Soccer

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

sally was hit by a bus and lost both arms knock knock who's there? not sally

How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

Women rights.

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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