Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

Whats 0+0 0

A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

squirrels with massive bonerss

What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

A guy starts writing a gag for a joke site. But then he couldn't think of a punchline.

-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? -Dog shit.

Women's Rights

What happens when you put two black people in a blender? That is physically impossible, you cannot fit two people in an ordinary blender.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

Why is siracha taste so good on chicken? Because it compliments the meat.

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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