What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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How do you cure AIDS? You can't.

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a man walks in to a bar he says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey laugh" so he goes in there and makes it laugh and gets a free beer ant then the next day he goes in and says "what can i get for a free beer" the bartender says "okay but first you have to make my donkey cry" so he goes in there and makes the horse cry and the bartender says " i will give you a free beer but first tell me what you did to make my donkey laugh and cry" the man says " first to make the donkey laugh i told the donkey i had a bigger penis than him then to make him cry i showed him

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

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Do your parents know you're gay?

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1)Where do you find a turtle with no legs? 2)Where? 1)Where you left it. 1)... Knock Knock... 2)Who's there? 1)...Not the turtle...

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Knock knock Who's there Heyyyy mackane!! ;)

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What do I smell like to you?? Crap.

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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when i'm away from home i sometimes get love sick, well they call it chlamydiae.

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

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Whats worse than being white and in harlem on the 4th of july? Your schizophrenic father leaving you a voicemail detailing the politics of successful encounters with prostitutes.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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