Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

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The Mets win the World Series

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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What did the homeless war veteran get for christmas? Nothing because we don't treat our veterans very well.

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How do you mess with Helen Keller? Move all the furniture in her room.

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Wishing to teach his donkey not to eat, a pedant did not offer him any food. When the donkey died of hunger, he said: ‘I’ve had a great loss. Just when he had learned not to eat, he died.

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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Q. What happened when a man went to a bar? A. Nothing, The bar was closed.

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What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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