"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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Chris:"knock, knock" Rhianna:"owwww..." Chris:"open da door" Rhianna:"so u can punch me in the face" Chris:"duhhh, I jus got brass knuckles"

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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