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Anti Joke

 

What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common?

They both live underground. Apart from the Eagle.

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13 Comments
 

Your momma's so fat that she should probably be worried about the increased risk of cardiovascular disease.

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32 Comments
 

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb?

Two, one to change it and the other to hold the ladder so the first man won't fall and hurt himself.

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19 Comments
 

Why did Suzie fall off the swing?

She had no arms.

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33 Comments
 

alert("The Game");

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112 Comments
 

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

Wheres my tractor?

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16 Comments
 

A duck walks into a over 7-11 and says "Give me some Chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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21 Comments
 

How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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13 Comments
 

the WNBA

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26 Comments
 

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?



Get in the car

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11 Comments
 

Roses are red, violets are blue
I've got Alzheimer's
cheese on toast

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24 Comments
 

So this guy walks into the doctor's and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this." The doctor says "Yes, you've shattered both your kneecaps. You'll never walk again."

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28 Comments
 

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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  • “I hope you're not a vegetarian.... because my dick is made of meat..”

    via: Anti-Pickup Line

  • “You aren't allowed to have a party, you aren't allowed to have music, you aren't allowed to play ball games, you aren't allowed to have....”

    via: Clarksonisms

  • “snuggies.”

    via: Pointless Inventions

  • “The power to unscramble an egg, but only after you've eaten it..”

    via: Pointless Super Powers

  • “Everytime i take of my sweater i start singing "its getting hot in here".”

    via: Things You Think Only You Do

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    via: ethugtxt

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